Earlier this week, multi-hyphenate celebrity
Jessica Simpson posted an Instagram pic for her 1.6 million followers of 3-year-old
daughter Maxwell in a swimsuit. Most of the commenters declared it adorable,
but some found Maxwell’s seemingly flirty pose inappropriate, even worryingly
so, considering the presence of online (and real-world) pedophiles, not to
mention our pop culture obsession with celebrity children.
It is
a cute photo. Little Maxwell is seated in a very age-appropriate swimsuit with one
hand on outthrust hip in a pose that might
be considered sexy from a sexy adult – say, if the 34-year-old Jessica were
doing it. But it’s unclear if Maxwell was posing at all or was simply caught by
the camera in a casual moment that happens to look posed; if the former, then she
was probably merely imitating what she has seen her mother do. In any case, a
three-year-old has no idea what sexy even means.
But the showbiz site Closer blamed mother Jessica for causing a “controversy” and polled its
readers, “Did you think Jessica’s picture was inappropriate?” Some certainly
did. One Instagram follower wrote: “Wtf can our children just b children like
why every little girl poses like a woman dont they know they're freakin
pedophiles out there ?!!!!sh*t what happen to a kid being a kid.” “Why
would she have her posing like that?” commented another.
Seventy-two percent of Closer’s nearly 1500
poll respondents voted that the pic was adorable and that it was unnecessary to
keep it off social media. A common reaction from that majority was along the
lines of, “If you see this as sexual, then YOU’RE the problem.”
Not necessarily. It’s perfectly reasonable to
see how a pic like this could be perceived inappropriately by pedophiles for
whom pics like Maxwell’s provide a sexual allure. Some might consider this
concern to be paranoid, but we live in a world in which we have surrendered
more and more of our privacy to a technology that is increasingly out of our
control, and we have a responsibility to take every precaution to prevent sick
people from having easy access – like through social media – to photos of our
children.
My friend Bob Hamer is now a novelist and
screenwriter, but for 25 years he was an undercover FBI agent (you can check
out his exploits in The
Last Undercover). One of
his longest and most successful assignments was infiltrating and ultimately
bringing down a pedophile ring. Sadly, this made Bob an expert on what makes
these predators tick. I asked him if pedophiles would swarm on celebrity
children pics like Maxwell Simpson’s photo, and if the pose or dress made a
difference. He replied,
The more provocative the better in the minds
of these men, and provocative photos of youthful celebrities was a real plus.
What we might deem “cute” would be viewed in a whole different light.
Little kids are hilarious and charming when
they act like adults – shuffling around in mom’s high heels, for example, or
posing hand-on-hip with a pout like a grown-up swimsuit model. But as Bob says,
pedophiles see that behavior in a different light, and that’s what we must be
aware of when we share pics of our children on social media.
As psychologist Sandra Wheatley told Closer:
Although getting your toddler to pose
in an adult way wearing a swimming costume may be fine if you're keeping the
pictures within the family, sharing them on social media is not a good idea –
whether you're a celebrity or not. As a parent you are taking responsibility
for someone else's decisions until they are adult, and Jessica's daughter may
not be happy with this image when she hits 18.
Was Maxwell Simpson’s photo inappropriately
sexual? I and most others don’t think so, but what matters is that there are
disturbed people who would find it
sexual and be drawn to it precisely because it excites their perversity. You
might argue that that’s their problem, not Maxwell’s – but as the father of
three very young girls, I wouldn’t want pictures of them feeding the fantasies
of sexual criminals.
It’s hard to fault Jessica Simpson. She’s
just a proud parent with a parent’s impulse to share photos of her pride and
joy. But for the sake of our children and our culture, all of us – celebrities and
otherwise – need to be more conscious of the casual ways in which we
unwittingly compromise the privacy and innocence of our daughters, and potentially
even endanger them.
(This article originally appeared here on Acculturated, 5/29/15)
